Top 10 Reasons You Came to Jewell
10. You couldn’t get into Wash U
9. Your mom went here
8. Your dad went here
7. You were conceived here
6. To play football
5. Because it’s a God fearing Baptist school
4. You’re from Johnson County
3. For the architecture program
2. There’s way more black kids here than at high school!
1. The hot chick from admissions gave you your tour
From: AJ Jacobs [mailto:aj.jacobs@me.com]
Sent: Wed 4/13/2011 8:46 AM
To: Paper
Subject: Re: College Students Rebelling with ComedyHi Paper, Congrats on The Paper. Great stuff. Good luck in your quest for more ink. And thanks for reading Esquire, both for its style tips and articles. AJ
That’s right. We’re funny and stylish.
Issue 3 is now digitized. We had some difficulty stuffing this much awesomeness into the series of tubes that are the internets. That’s why it’s so late being posted online.
So, awhile back we fired off an email to Joel Stein. We never expected a reply, but this is part of the encouraging email we just got back:
[Paper], sir, is a noble endeavor.
I checked it out and it is really cool looking…good luck not getting kicked out of school.
fuckin’ a.
And they would have gotten away with this tweet too if it wasn’t for us dumb kids and our mangy paper.
The March 10th issue of Paper
We’re not biweekly, we’re biwinning.
Our latest issue.
You probably don’t have a copy because we ran out of ink really quickly. We’re working on fixing that.
How sad, not even her coworkers read her emails.
Everyone, we feel it’s time to reveal our source of inside information at Student Affairs,
You should all follow so you’re in the know too.
